"I know how you feel"

One of the worst things you can say to someone whith chronic pain, is "I know how you feel". Even if you have also experienced different forms of pain, you never truly comprehend how that person feels or what they are experiencing. 

Even if you are only trying to be kind, the words "I know how you feel", can create an invalidation of that person's feelings. Because they look at you, and you seem fine. They then want to know why they are the only ones who seem too weak to deal with the blows life has dealt them. 

Telling someone that you're experiencing pain can take great courage. When someone then tends to respond with  "yeah, me too", it seems as though that person's pain is not truly aknowedged. This can cause the person with chronic pain to be discouraged when it  comes to reaching out for help. When someone says "I am in pain", you can aknowledge that you are also experiencing pain, but not without first trying to help them. Ask them what THEY need.